I’m Right Here

It’s bedtime. I’ve worked a long and stressful day and came home to a messy house, dinner that had to be cooked, and a fussy baby. And now it’s finally bedtime. All I want to do is sleep. All she wants to do is stay attached to me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love holding my baby. I love rocking her and singing to her. I love the scent of her hair and the feel of her little tiny fingers caressing my arm. But right now, I want to sleep. I want her to sleep. And I have to put her down.

She is not pleased, to say the least. As soon as I lay her down she cries. I rub her belly and make shushing sounds to calm her. She begins to relax. Until I stop touching her.

So, I do what any parent would do who wants to calm baby and get some rest, I reach through the bars of the crib and place my hand on her belly again and lay down on the floor next to her. She can’t see me. She starts crying again.

But I’m still here.

You can’t see me, but I’m still here.

Listen to my voice as I sing to you. I. Am. Right. Here.

How many times must God feel this way with me? Not the need to rest, God doesn’t need sleep like I do. But how often do I want him to stay holding me in his arms and immediately cry out if I feel like he has left me alone?

He hasn’t left me alone. He’s just out of my line of sight. But if I listen to his voice, I can remind myself that he’s not gone. He never leaves us. He is right here.

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.  Deuteronomy 31:8

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